this house.

warmth, do you too choose
to elude me?
perhaps, in my delusion
that one should never
fear loneliness
i am alone.

in that case, i am incensed
by your outright mockery.
do you not know what this does to me?

tonight, like every other
i stayed up awaiting your return
and as always,
amongst lit candles, in high heels and perfume,
i remembered that you never once disappointed in keeping away.

no more of this, please
i choose to rid myself of this want.
maybe in solitude,
i'd find myself much safer
wrapped in the certainty of it's presence.