maybe, tomorrow.

"Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trusts,
always hopes,
always preserves."

once again, god, you have let me down.

whenever am i going to realize that life isn't a fairytale, i don't know. what with all the destructiveness around me, i'm surprised that i haven't wised up yet. whatever happened to my supposedly high intellect, i'd like to know. (mummy, don't tell me you lied to me too.)

i personally think, of all times i've needed a friend to bleed my minuscule problems to (yes i am aware of dying people, animals, and agriculture.), today tops the list.

this is not insecurity.

is everyone only special on their birthday? (aj shaddup.)

seriously though.

the title of this post is true, really. it's just a random thought i suddenly just had.

btw thanks sheri, cho, qi tai for the crazy shots, and everyone in general for the laughter. you guys are the ones that really matter.

<3

girl from ipanema.

so im sitting at starbucks, fresh out of work, again. (please don't tell my parents. hahaa.)

the trip to malaysia turned out great, though the ride there was ball busting. (thanks a lot roy.) lots of foozeball, lots of alcohol, lots of dipping and sandy balls.

unfortunately, no pictures. :(

but enough about me, what has everyone been up to? the usual work and alcoholism?

i suppose with turning 21, i should now feel the need to lead the eexpected harried, hurried and haggard life of the average singaporean. but i really don't. so much for reaponsibility that comes with age.

the truth is that i really don't feel all that different. if anything, i miss the devil-may-care attitude youth inspired more than ever. how awesome would it be to be paid to do nothing?

which reminds me..

need to get another job. need to get another job. need to get another job.

age like wine (or cheese).

i'm tired of pretending. i don't need to be liked to feel loved, and i've forgotten that.

i miss the care free existance of my 16 year old self. who knew four or five years could make such a difference?

mellowed is one word for it, and losing your soul another. words have power, and again, something else i've forgotten.

i miss typing about my nonsensical escapades, the existance of an audience regardless. sure, the aftermath of drunken adventures, breathless hellos and sullen goodbyes left much to be desired. but at that point in my life, i can at very least be sure that i was alive.

amidst all the chaos, i found security in myself. the irony is that order in my life just made me lose control of every thing i thought i knew.