sometimes, i have to remind myself.

apart from the hatred i have towards zee, i have to say, i can't blame her alone. have i not been assertive enough about my stand? boyfr, you need to take me more seriously when i say no.

on a different note, i find myself falling more in both love and hate with my job. customers remembering my name makes my entire shitty day better, while my memory when it comes to the specials consistently fail me.

why,
oh why GOD.

today wasted the bulk of my day chasing what i thought was a cash check. flew down to bedok to collect my IC so i could take my paycheck in cash. got to bedok interchange to find the bank closed. went to the POSB branch in kovan, queued for forever and the teller told me with this shit-eating grin that it was a CROSS CHEQUE.

i was ready to murder.

filled in my particulars and dropped the cheque like a normal person, while on the inside i was seething with the madness of a fugitive from the institute of mental heath.

like,
KANINABEHCHAOCHEEBYE
NINABUAYNEHBU.

i have no idea what i just said.

note to self:

paychecks are a minor issue, i know. but today when i looked at the cheque in my hands, i knew this was getting dangerous and i should do something about it. but rather than get up and do something to stop myself from wasting into oblivion.. i wonder why sometimes i continue sitting there and thinking of ways to stop myself from rotting.

ra, actions to words please.