perverse pleasure.

met up with D AGAIN, this time for dinner and of course drinks (we never do dates without alcohol) out, next to indochine. the german men at the next table kept eye-groping us, and it was quite annoying. i joked about how they were probably wondering what a girl like me was doing with a man like D. HAHAHAHAA, I'M SORRY I COULDN'T HELP IT YOUR EXPRESSION WAS FUCKING PRICELESS.

eitherways, erdinger's beer is awesome and i love it. i am more manly than D, who has his whiskey coke. again. this man is about as unadventurous with drinks as a snail is with salt i tell you.

then went back to his place with the beautiful view and had- you guessed it, whiskey coke. well i did. he didn't feel like having anymore than he already did. then..

the dreaded PILLOWTALK.

to be honest, i saw this coming two days ago. if i knew it was going to be today he'd confess, then i would have been cruel and called to cancel and told him i was going out with someone else instead. but no, ignoring my womanly intuition, i went. and god how i regret it.

we started talking about FEELINGS. oh how i abhor the subject like the plague. he tells me he doesn't understand me, and that he wouldn't hurt me so he doesn't get why i'm afraid.

i don't see what's so hard to get, really. i simply do not want to be in a relationship. a person doesn't climb into a rollercoster seat after throwing up from just the ride before. that's just stupid, so why in hell would i do that to myself?

sigh.

THIS IS WHY I LOVE RUFFLES SO MUCH.

I just don't get why men have to be such girls sometimes and complicate things. it's sex, for fuck's sake. tsk.